The Necessary Ingredients for a Great Team

By: Sean | January 22nd, 2009

The difference between a great recreational football team and a mediocre one isn’t necessarily about getting the right balance between offense and defense. It isn’t always about hustle, either, because sometimes you can leave it all on the pitch and the result just doesn’t go your way. It isn’t totally about skill. How many times have you played against or been on a team of really talented individual players and the squad just didn’t gel? I’ve noticed that regardless of whether you are playing a 4-4-2, a Catenaccio, or a 1-9 (some guys just don’t like to play defense) there are certain character roles that every team needs to be successful. What are these necessary ingredients for a great team? I’ll tell you. If I was really on my metaphor game, I’d tie this whole post together with a cooking theme and add phrases like “let your midfield simmer and add just a dash of wing play” but that sounds totally lame and I’ve never watched Gordon Ramsay or Iron Chef, so I don’t know any culinary terms, anyway.

A Goalkeeper. You need a goalkeeper. Not someone to play goalkeeper. You need a goalkeeper. As net-minders are a rare and strange breed, they are automatically worth their share of the team fee. Anyone willing to dive head-first into a stampede of boots to grab a ball or throw their body into the path of a point-blank rocket shot is a unique creature. Goalkeepers don’t see the bottle as half empty or as half full. They see it as another chance to crack open the the bottle top with their teeth. Good goalies will keep an average team in a match long enough to make them think they can win and even a bad keeper is still filling the position so you don’t have to. Anytime you meet a soccer player and he owns a pair of keeper’s gloves, get to know him. The goal he saves could your own (goal). By the way, my O-30 men’s club in Portland, Oregon is looking for a keeper this spring. If you live here and want to play with an awesome team, drop a comment. Seriously. We’re awesome.

A Dribbler. All good squads have at least one player who needs to have the ball at their feet. Usually, this person is ten years younger than the rest of the club and hasn’t discovered the joys of getting older, but so what? Nothing wears down a defense like a nineteen year old kid who can run forever, has two good knees, and still wants to prove he’s got “mad skillz.” How do you defend against a dribbler? You need a…

Big, Bad Central Defender (a.k.a. Enforcer). Nothing stops the indefatigable nineteen year old striker faster than the six foot two sweeper who doesn’t have two good knees but knows how to bring down the young striker. My experience has informed me that not many players can score when they are sprawled flat on the pitch. Your enforcer will break up set plays to the mixer, see runs as they are developing and generally get on everybody’s case to make sure they are doing their job. This guy has zero reluctance to tackle in the box as required and should you get in a throw-down with the other team, well, “my dad can beat the s**t out of your dad!”

The Angry Guy. Often, this role is also filled by the Enforcer, but not exclusively. When play is going well, you won’t hear much from him, but when the midfielders fail to follow a runner or the marking gets slack on a corner kick, this player will explode with directions, rants, and “motivation”. This is not a criticism. This is usually a much-needed jolt to the heart of the team to get everybody’s focus back into the play. After the match, they go back to a normal, unassuming persona. You will know this player because they will develop a nickname like “Angry Jim” or “Loco Rodrigo”. They are usually a defender.

The Ringer. Do you know someone who played in college or perhaps professionally? Of course you do! They are your center midfielder! They understand control, distribution, and build-up a little more clinically than everybody else and can make the entire team play up a little better. They also take your penalty shots. You will go out of your way to buy this person a player card for a single match if they are visiting–usually from outside the country–and in town on match day. Your teammates will dig it.

The Health Care Professional. This may not seem like an important role, but when the horror tackle leaves your leg looking like Joe Thiesmann or Eduardo Da Silva, you really need someone with medical experience directing the first aid efforts…not a team debate about whether or not to “Push it back in!” Plus, they often have access to really good pain killers.

Beer Guy. Why? Because he brings beer! Duh! Beer make team happy!

The Strikingly Handsome, Super Organized, Overwhelmingly Positive Manager. They make sure the team is registered, gets to the correct field on time, has clean uniforms that are neatly folded and arranged in numerical order, and emails match reminders and match summaries all season long. This person should also be bald and write for a football blog. I may be biased on this one, however.

What other character roles am I missing, Weekend Warriors? What other essential ingredients are required to put together a winning squad? Let me know.

I’m also totally serious about needing a keeper, too.